Break Down
by Roxal
Summary: I'm real sorry, Riku. You're a good kid. Stuff like this shouldn't happen to good people. Warnings: AU. Yaoi. Lemon. Angst. OCs. Status: Abandoned [RikuOC, slight RikuSora]
1. Break Me

Swirling. Pain. Hammering in my head. Wish it were a dream. Wish it would all go away. Can't breathe. Need to get away.  
  
"RIKU! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING?"  
  
A shrill, panicked female voice rang through the turbulent anger of the house, almost muffled by the pounding of boots and slamming open of a door.  
  
"OUT!"  
  
An older teen with silver-white hair returned in an equally loud voice. His strong, slim fingers pulled a black leather jacket off a peg on the wall as he slammed the door. Angrily, he shoved his fists into his pockets to wrap around a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He forcefully pulled one of the thin paper cylinders from its box and shoved it in his mouth. After a few flicks on his lighter, the end burned with a pale orange glow, and he snapped his hand away, taking a long drag.  
  
"FUCK!"  
  
Stop this pain. Can't live a lie. Can't be here. Need to go. Somewhere. Anywhere. Need to forget. Need this to be a dream.  
  
"Fuck."  
  
He whimpered pitifully, holding back the tears that threatened to bleed from the corners of his eyes. He'd made it to the city; downtown, to be exact, and now he slid down against a lamp post, bathed in the impure glow of neon and lamplight. He heaved a deep sigh, one from the very pit of his being. This couldn't be real. It couldn't have happened. But it had. He knew it had. So he had to forget.  
  
"Bar."  
  
The young man picked himself off the ground, dusting at the seat of his jeans. Taking one last drag on his cigarette, he flicked it to the ground, rubbing it out with the toe of his boot. Sparks flew and faded like ephemeral fireflies into the dim puddle of light. He smirked silently and made his way down the crowded street.  
  
A couple drunks meandered their way out of the small bar, throwing the door open as they laughed forcefully. The teen turned up the collar on his jacket as he shrugged off the obtrusive sound. One of the men knocked into his shoulder, but he let it go. Any other night he would've slugged the guy in the jaw, but tonight he wasn't in the mood for another confrontation.  
  
The bartender looked up from the stein he was polishing as the youth took his seat on one of the old wooden stools. His heavy boots clanked against the brass pole near the floor as he hefted his elbows onto the counter and buried his hands in his hair.  
  
"Rough night?" The older man asked gruffly, slamming the glass down on the wooden surface. The teen merely looked up at him with death in his eyes. The bartender scoffed. "So what'll it be?"  
  
"Give me the strongest shit you've got in this Godforsaken hellhole." He muttered. Then, as an after thought, "make it a double."  
  
"That bad, huh?" The burly man asked while pulling a particularly dangerous- looking bottle out from under the counter.  
  
"And worse." The younger replied, running a hand up through his already disheveled hair. "They found out."  
  
"Oh." He replied sympathetically. It was obvious by now that they knew each other. The bartender poured a shot and set it in front of the other. "I'm real sorry, Riku. You're a good kid. Stuff like this shouldn't happen to good people."  
  
"This is all BULLSHIT, Ryuji!" Riku yelled, tossing back his shot. "They fucking CAUGHT US! I was going to die." His voice dropped at the end of his sentence and he held up his glass for another dose of the intoxicating poison.  
  
Ryuji poured another, though with some reluctance. "Maybe you should go away for a while. Spend the night at Hideki's or something. Or with that Sora friend of yours."  
  
"Maybe later." He sighed. "Right now I need to- - I need to clear my head." He swallowed the brown liquid, making a sour face as he did so.  
  
"Well this stuff isn't gonna help any, Ri. C'mon, go somewhere else. You don't need to be he-" He was cut off by a thumping at the other end of the bar.  
  
"HEY! Whadoesitaketagesomeservice'roundere?" an obviously drunken man called to anyone who would listen.  
  
"Sorry, gotta go. But please, Riku, think about what I've said. If you'd only-" The pounding became louder and Ryuji eventually resigned to the man at the other end, leaving Riku with an empty shot glass. Being the regular he was, he leaned over the counter to reach for the bottle again and poured himself five or six more shots. About fifteen minutes later, he was completely out of it and Ryuji was trying to shove the drunkard out of his tavern.  
  
"'ey! Gerroff meh, gerroff! Icnthrowmiself out!" Riku looked stupidly over at the scene; the man was trying desperately to hold onto the door while Ryuji (who was twice the other's size) tried to push him out.  
  
The teen sighed again, longing for the day's events to have been some horrific nightmare, but he knew they weren't. Now everyone would know. He couldn't pretend anymore. But maybe he hadn't wanted to pretend in the first place. He merely had to, for both his and Hideki's sakes.  
  
"Hey, babe. Need some cheering up?" Another young man interrupted Riku from his reverie. Bleary-eyed, Riku looked him over. Violet eyes flashed as ear- length black hair swished with his movements. He had a lean, tall build, and even with clothing one could tell he had well-toned muscles. His clothing complemented his coloring, as he wore an open button-down violet shirt, a ribbed black tank top and a pair of tight black jeans. A smirk formed on Riku's lips and he scoffed.  
  
"What can you offer me?" He asked coldly, turning back to examine his empty glass.  
  
"Mmm, well if you're gonna be rude about it-"  
  
"Hey, do you wanna fuck me or not?" Riku returned, glaring daggers at the other man, who in turn leaned in seductively.  
  
"Well, we certainly know what we want, now don't we?" He smiled, running a finger along the teen's jawline. "Let's make this interesting, shall we?"  
  
"Shut up, talk is cheap. Let's go." He shot up from his seat but took a moment to steady himself, as he was quite thoroughly drunk by now. The man wrapped his arm around the teen's waist as they headed for the back exit. Ryuji, still struggling with the drunkard, saw the two leaving and immediately panicked.  
  
"Riku!"  
  
"Put it on my tab, Ryuji." Riku called back just as the door closed behind him.  
  
Ryuji slumped his shoulders, looking worriedly at the closed wooden door on the other side of the small tavern. Then, with newfound strength he shoved the drunk out and slammed the front door, returning to his usual perch at the counter. He scrubbed the shot glass Riku had used and slammed the now nearly empty bottle back under the counter. Riku'd gotten himself into a right mess, he had. What would Hideki do when he found out? 


	2. One Night Stand

"So, my place or yours?" The brunette asked playfully, fingering the hem of Riku's shirt.  
  
"Why not here?" Riku asked, his eyes full of hurt mixed with drunken passion.  
  
"Here? But it's so-"  
  
"I want to get this over with." He ignored the other's protests, wrapping a strong arm around the other's waist, pulling him closer.  
  
"Okaaay." The brunette replied uncertainly. "So, uh, you want top or bottom?" He asked, trying to be seductive again.  
  
"Bottom." The teen replied certainly. "And be rough with me. I can handle it."  
  
"Oh, aren't you the cheeky one?" The man smiled, but Riku silenced him with a glare.  
  
"I told you to shut up. Talking is unnecessary." Riku emphasized his point by covering the other's lips with his own, soon probing them with his tongue. He was allowed entrance, and they kissed hungrily in the dark alleyway for a few moments.  
  
Riku, barely able to contain himself, began to pull at the other's clothing, sliding the oxford off his shoulders before pulling the dark tank top over his head. On hand tangled in the short black hair as the other slid up and down the length of the other's tan back. Riku soon felt the man grappling with his belt buckle and moved a hand down to help unfasten it. Soon they were both completely nude, Riku slightly trembling in anticipation. He knew what was coming, and at that moment, he needed it more than anything.  
  
"Turn around." The brunette's now husky voice whispered in his ear. Riku readily complied, gripping the brick wall in front of him for support. He bit his lip as he felt the first intruding digit, familiar pain searing through him. But he didn't care. Soon he would get what he needed.  
  
A second saliva-slickened finger probed his entrance and began sliding in and out, causing Riku to moan, then hiss: "I told you to be rough. Just do it already!" He got his request and let out a deep scream as he felt the warm hardness thrust into him. His hands balled into fists and he bowed his head, fighting back the pain that ripped through him for the first few moments. Then the man hit that sacred spot, making Riku's breath hitch as his already-blurred vision fill with stars. He arched his back and gasped as the spot was hit over and over again. He leaned harder against the wall, his pleasure-slack body threatening to fall over. The hard bricks scratched at his arms, causing tiny cuts in his pale skin. The pain mixed with the pleasure and he let out another scream as the shaft inside him released its climax.  
  
When Riku felt the other pull out, he turned again and slumped against the wall, sliding down to the ground. Though the other had climaxed, Riku's erection still throbbed between his legs and he wrapped a shaky hand around it. The man noticed this and volunteered his services once again, taking the teen's length in his mouth. The youth moaned softly, thrusting up immediately in response to this action. The man bobbed his head slowly, massaging the other's member with his tongue. It didn't take long for Riku to climax, spilling his seed into the man's mouth, who swallowed what he could, letting the rest land on the teen's toned stomach.  
  
After they caught their breath, they both dressed as a song started and drifted through the thin back door of the bar. Unlike the other songs that had been playing that night, all of which were loud and fast, this song was slow, sad, a love ballad. Perhaps even an apology.  
  
'No I never meant to do you wrong. That's what I came here to say. But if I was wrong, then I'm sorry. Don't let it stand in our way.' Then, louder, 'Cuz my head just aches when I think of the things that I shouldn't have done. But life is for living, we all know, and I don't wanna live it alone. And you said, "Bye."'  
  
Riku paused, his shirt halfway over his head. "Hideki." He murmured. "Oh, fuck me." He dressed quickly and began running out of the alley.  
  
"Hey! I didn't get you number! Hell, I don't even know your name!" The brunette called impatiently after him, struggling to pull his clothes on and follow the speeding teen.  
  
"It doesn't matter! I already have someone! This was a mistake!" Riku called back, disappearing around a corner.  
  
"Well, shit." The brunette huffed, crossing his arms, then retreated back into the bar. 


	3. Make it Better

Riku stopped running once he made it out of the city. As sobriety set in, so did guilt. "Stupid fucking idiot." He muttered, hitting himself in the head. "Fucking moron. What have I done?"  
  
As he walked, he soon realized exactly where he was: In front of Sora's house. Of course. He usually came here when he was in trouble. But how was Sora going to understand this? After all, he didn't know. Still drunk, however, Riku decided to tell him anyway. He was his best friend, right? He'd still be there for him, wouldn't he?  
  
He sneaked around to the back of the house, careful not to tread on any of Mrs. Urashima's flowers. Picking up a handful of pebbles, he picked out the boy's window and chucked a small rock at it. It made a satisfying "thwack," but there was no response. After throwing one or two more pebbles, an obviously sleepy Sora pushed the window open. After a wide yawn, he regarded the dark figure in the yard, noting the silvery hair and assuming it was Riku.  
  
"Riku?" He asked dreamily. "It's 3 in the morning. Whaddaya need this early?" Sora yawned again, running a hand up through his horribly messy hair.  
  
"I need to talk." He answered uncertainly.  
  
"'Bout what? I'm tired. I dunno if I c'n answer intelligently." He leaned out on the windowsill, head drooping slightly.  
  
"Just c'mon, I reeeally needa talk." He said again, making a grand gesture with his hands and nearly losing his balance. Sora perked up.  
  
"You're drunk, aren't you?"  
  
"No." A pause. "Yes." He looked guiltily down.  
  
"Stay right there. I'm coming." Sora disappeared into his room for a moment, then reappeared, climbing out onto the porch roof and jumping with the grace of a cat (which came from years of practice) to the ground eight feet below.  
  
"So what did you need to talk about?" Sora asked, crossing his arms.  
  
"Follow me." Riku gestured, leading them down the long yard to the beach, then settled himself onto a rather large rock. Sora seated himself beside the older teen, and for a moment they sat in silence, letting the sound of the waves wash over them.  
  
"Sooo." Sora began, but was cut off.  
  
"I'm gay." Riku said quickly, looking away.  
  
"What?" Sora turned, setting his hands on his knees, confusion covering his face.  
  
"I am," he said, almost insultingly slowly, " a homosexual."  
  
"Oh." Sora trailed off, brows knitting together in confusion. "So when did this come about?"  
  
"Uh, I think when I was, about fourteen. Yeah."  
  
"And you waited three years to tell me, why?" Sora crossed his arms again.  
  
"Cuz I am in a shitload of trouble, my friend." He answered, crossing his arms behind his head.  
  
"No, you're just very, very drunk." He stood, looking the older teen in the eyes. "Go home, Riku."  
  
"No, that's just the thing! I /can't/ go home, Sora!"  
  
"Why the fuck not?"  
  
"Because they /know/. My parents. And they hate me now. I am so screwed."  
  
"So, what? Were you planning on just coming here and staying for a few days? Riku, you just told me something that could potentially change our entire friendship! Whether it's for the better or worse, I don't know, but I- -I just need to think about this for a while, ok?!" Sora nearly yelled, obviously a bit upset about his friend's hasty confession. He started to leave, but felt Riku grab his arm. He wheeled around, ready for an outburst, but stopped completely when he saw tears in the other's eyes.  
  
"Please don't say that. Please don't say you need to 'think about it.' Whenever someone says that, they end up hating me. I don't want you to hate me, Sora. I don't wan-" He stopped, suddenly pulling the younger teen into a tight hug, sobbing into his shoulder. Sora stood shocked for a moment, then tentatively returned the hug, stroking the other's hair lightly.  
  
"I didn't say I was going to hate you. Riku, calm down. Everything's going to be okay. Everything's gonna be fine."  
  
"No it's not." He choked between sobs. "No it's not. It can't be. Not after what I've done. Not after that." He gripped Sora tighter.  
  
"Why? What did you do?"  
  
"I-I- -I cheated on him! I love him! God help me, I love him and I cheated on him!"  
  
"Who?" Sora pulled away, trying to look his friend in the eye.  
  
"Hideki." Then, after a moment, "My boyfriend."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I don't know. I- -There was so much going on today. My parents- -They caught us together and I- -I just couldn't take it. I should've went to him for comfort, I should've-- but I didn't! I went to a fucking bar and got drunk. I don't even know the bastard's name! I hate myself so much right now. If I lose him- -I think I'll kill myself." He whimpered, looking into Sora's eyes.  
  
"Riku, don't talk that way." He stroked his friend's cheek. "Do you love him?"  
  
"With everything I am."  
  
"Does he love you?"  
  
"..."  
  
"Does he love you, Riku?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Then he'll understand." Sora looked into his friend's eyes a moment longer then sighed, looking away. "Go to him." He closed his eyes. "It's getting early, Riku. Go to him quickly." Riku nodded, then stood. Just before he walked away, though, he turned back to the younger teen.  
  
"Sora?"  
  
"Mm?"  
  
Riku closed his eyes and placed a light, chaste kiss on Sora's pink lips. He lingered for a moment, then stood again.  
  
"Thanks."  
  
"Don't mention it." Sora replied, a bit dazedly. Riku smiled, then turned to run down the beach, waving good-bye.  
  
Sora watched after him for a moment then turned his eyes to the horizon of ocean and sky. The moon was dipping into the waves, its light waning against the dark blanket of night. He smiled in spite of himself, touching his fingertips to his now flushed lips.  
  
'That was interesting.'  
  
And with that thought, he walked back up to his home. 


	4. Make it Worse

Five A.M. Riku stood on the wet grass outside Hideki's bedroom window. He surveyed his shoes for a moment, crunching the thick blades that shimmered with fresh dew, and for an instant he thought it was rude. He dismissed the thought, shaking his head and wondered what in God's name made him think that. Then his mind's train switched tracks completely, as he thought of his beloved.  
  
Hideki was lucky. He'd slept in a bed tonight. He hadn't worried about a damned thing (though somewhere in his mind Riku knew that he'd worried about him). He'd probably slept soundly all night, and for an instant, Riku was envious.  
  
Hideki had told his parents years ago that he was gay, and they had been calm and understanding. He never fought with them, and they let him live in their house, like nice, rational parents do. Not that it mattered now, because Hideki was 19 and lived in his own apartment. Riku had a key, but didn't feel like using it. His love had left the window open, so he thought he'd sneak in that way. And he did.  
  
As soon as he was fully inside the room, he let his eyes trace over the familiar curves of the older teen's body. His bare tan chest rose and fell with his deep breathing, and a plain white sheet covered him to just below his navel. His arms were resting above his head, one of his hands buried in the crown of short, black hair. Thick lashes rested on his cheeks, attached to eyelids that hid deep, inviting brown eyes. His pink lips were parted, glistening in the pale light that filtered through the curtains, merely begging to be kissed. Riku, however, resisted temptation, observing the scene for a moment longer before sitting down beside the other.  
  
Hideki stirred at the presence, moaning slightly and unconsciously shifting closer to his lover. Riku smiled, reaching a hand over to stroke his boyfriend's smooth locks.  
  
"Mmm." Hideki sighed, eyes fluttering open. When he realized who was beside him, he shifted himself into an upright position, leaning back against the headboard. "Riku." He smiled, leaning in to kiss him. When he realized his lips had met the other's cheek instead of lips, however, he pulled away in confusion. "What's wrong?"  
  
"Don't." Riku nearly whispered, looking away in shame. "I don't deserve you."  
  
"What are talking about?" Confusion covered his features and was quickly replaced with silent understanding. "Riku, what happened? What did your parents say?" He asked with pure concern.  
  
"This isn't about them." Then, after a reflective pause, "or maybe it is. I don't know." Riku sighed, letting his hand find his lover's, squeezing it tightly. "I love you, Hideki." He looked back into the other's eyes. "And I need to know, I need to be /sure/, that you love me too."  
  
"Riku." Hideki's face melted into a mixture of love and worry. His free hand went to the side of the younger's face, stroking his cheek with his thumb. "Of course I love you. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone. Now what are you on about?"  
  
"I did something stupid. Something really, really stupid. Please don't hate me. I'd die if you hated me." He closed his eyes, leaning into the other's hand. "I- -I went to the Ukatsu tonight."  
  
"Oh, Riku. I-Why?" His hand dropped to the other's shoulder, expression showing hurt mixed with disappointment.  
  
"I- -I wanted to- -T-they were so angry with me, Hideki! They said I was disgrace. They said I- -I had to leave- To go /somewhere/."  
  
"But why there? Why didn't you come to me?" He straightened himself up; eyes still locked with the other's.  
  
"I-I don't know. But I should have. I really should have. I should've sought comfort in you, but I went to alcohol, and I- -I- -God, I'm so sorry, Hideki. I'm so sorry." Tears began to leak from his eyes again, and his boyfriend squeezed his shoulder in an attempt to get him to continue. "I sought- -I sought comfort in another."  
  
"What?" The hand was withdrawn.  
  
"I-I didn't mean to! I was drunk and angry and scared and-Oh, please, Hideki, don't be mad at me! I didn't mean to- -I didn't do it to hurt you. I'm so sorry. I love yo-"  
  
"If you loved me you wouldn't have done it." Hideki silenced his companion, eyes never breaking their contact. "Riku, I thought you cared about me-"  
  
"I /do/ care about you!"  
  
"But you obviously don't," he continued, as if Riku'd never spoken, "if you'd do something like that to me."  
  
"Please, Hideki, don't be this way! I was drunk, I was distraught. Please, Hideki, please forgive me! Please!" He choked out, all-out sobbing now. His hand balled the sheets while the other kept a tight grip on Hideki's, which was trying to pull away.  
  
Hideki sat for a moment, observing the wretched state of the other. He'd never seen him cry. He was usually proud and strong, or happy and sweet. He was never weak, never helpless like he was now. Something in his heart twinged, and he felt a bit of remorse. Maybe Riku really /did/ love him if he was this torn up about the thought of Hideki leaving him. His inhibitions faltered and he pulled the other into a tight hug. Riku froze for a moment, then hugged back, crying into his love's hair.  
  
"Riku, look, I-" He sighed, stroking Riku's back lightly. "I don't know what to do. The rational part of me says that I should leave you. If you cheat once, what's to stop you from cheating again? But, my heart says-" he closed his eyes, leaning into Riku's neck, "My heart says I still love you."  
  
"Hideki." Riku whispered, kissing his love's shoulder. "I love you too."  
  
"But-" He pulled away, looking into Riku's red, tear-stained eyes. "I need time. I need to sort things out. Just- Let me think about for a few days, okay?" Riku stiffened.  
  
"No." He whimpered. "You- -no! You're going to leave me, aren't you? Hideki, please!"  
  
"Riku, STOP IT! Stop acting like a child! You just told me something very serious! This could fuck up our relationship, ya know? I can't just go on pretending everything's perfect. I can't ignore this! I need to understand how I feel about it and how it affects us before we can continue our lives together. Riku-" He paused, looking downward. "I /do/ love you, but I need to know if I love you that much."  
  
They sat in silence for a moment, tears still flowing down Riku's cheeks. His hands lay flat on his thighs while Hideki's were knotted together in his lap. Finally, the older bit his lip and looked up. "I- -I think you should leave now, Riku."  
  
Riku nodded silently and went to the window. As he lifted himself to climb out, he turned back for a moment.  
  
"I'm so sorry, Hideki. I love you."  
  
Hideki didn't answer, just ran a hand trough his hair, letting it rest on the back of his neck. Riku turned away in understanding and walked out into the brightening morning. 


	5. An Understanding

Sora didn't get back to sleep that night. He couldn't, after what Riku had told him. Around 7 a.m., he decided to go for a walk to clear his mind. He ended up at the rather large park at the center of the island. He looked around to see children playing, and briefly thought about when he was that age. How he and Riku would play silly games or pretend they were heroes in some pretend battle. He smiled. He always had fun with Riku. He always felt good with Riku.  
  
And now he knew a secret that his best friend had kept from him for three years. Three years is a long time, especially if the person the secret is being kept from is your best friend. Sora was slightly angry about this. Why didn't he tell him? Didn't he trust him? Didn't he care about him?  
  
But he tried to think of it from Riku's point of view. He was scared. He didn't want to lose his friend, probably. And it's a hard thing to just bring up, too. "Oh, by the way, I'm gay." That sounded stupid, Sora laughed, but it was true. Poor Riku. That secret had probably been eating away at him for those three years. Sora sighed sadly, wondering how things had gone for his silver-haired friend and his boyfriend last night.  
  
Speak of the devil, Sora eyed a familiar figure sitting on a bench some yards ahead of him. He smiled and walked up casually, sitting down beside him.  
  
"Hey." Sora said cheerfully, then noted his friend's appearance. His hair was a mess, his eyes were puffy, and his clothes were disheveled. "You okay?" He asked with concern.  
  
"Maybe." Riku turned to face him and Sora noted that his eyes were red. He looked like he'd been crying for a while. Sora put a hand on his shoulder.  
  
"You need to talk?"  
  
Riku closed his eyes and leaned back, taking a deep breath. "I dunno." He paused and let his head hang. "God, I feel so dirty. Like a fucking slut." He scratched his head and smiled a bit. "I'm a man-whore." He paused, and then they both laughed at how absurd that sounded.  
  
"No you're not. Two guys doesn't make you a whore. Dirty, yes, but not a whore." Sora flashed a grin.  
  
"Whatever." Riku replied. They both sat in comfortable silence for a while, before Sora decided to voice his concerns.  
  
"So, how did things go with Hideki last night?" Sora asked, leaning forward and folding his hands between his knees.  
  
"To tell the truth, I really don't know." Riku sighed again, looking up at a few stray clouds. "Could've gone better." He paused. "Could've gone worse, too. He said he needed time to think about our relationship. I just hope it's not too long. It kills me to know I can't be with him." He bowed his head. There was another stretch of silence.  
  
"Riku, what's he like?" Sora turned to his friend, curiosity shining in his eyes.  
  
Riku smiled a little, enjoying Sora's innocent expression. "Well, he's kind of like you, actually. He's one of the nicest people I've ever met. Always happy and concerned about everyone but himself. But he's very passionate. Not like, romantic passionate (though he's that too), but passionate about his beliefs. When he feels something, he /feels/ it. When he believes in something, he defends it until death. So I'm guessing he's torn right now, because he feels love for me, but he believes that since I- -I cheated, he should leave me." Riku sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I'm such a fucking idiot. Screw up once and you lose the love of your life."  
  
Sora bit his lip, unsure of what to say. He finally came up with something a bit reassuring and put his hand on his friend's shoulder. "Relax, Riku. I know he means a lot to you, but, well, if you /do/ lose him, you're only 17. You have plenty of time to find someone else."  
  
"Like who? There aren't a lot of good guys on this damned island. Hideki's the only decent lover I've had. That guy last night seemed like a real slimeball too. If I lose Hideki, I feel like I'd be destined to be alone." He cupped his head in his hands, staring down at his boots. "You know," he scoffed, "I have no place to go now. I was going to move in with Hideki if everything worked out-"  
  
"Move in with him? His parents would let you do that?" Sora asked, a bit shocked.  
  
"Parents? Oh, no, Hideki has his own apartment." Riku smiled, flashing the key.  
  
"Wait a sec- -How old is he?" Sora's brows furrowed together in suspicion.  
  
"Nineteen. Why? Oh, what, did you think I was dating a thirty-year-old?" He laughed.  
  
"I just don't know with you anymore, Riku." He replied, trying to joke, but it sounded a bit more hurt than he meant to.  
  
"Sora." Riku's face softened as he draped an arm around his friend's shoulder. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I just- -I just didn't want to lose you, ya know? You're my best friend, and I love you." He felt Sora stiffen for an instant and only smiled in response.  
  
"I-it's okay." Sora replied. "I- -I love you, too." He gave a half-hearted smile. Riku laughed.  
  
"You're acting paranoid now, Sora. I'm not gonna jump you or anything." He shook the smaller teen lightly, his eyes shining.  
  
"I know, I know." He sighed. "I just- -feel weird, I guess. I don't mean any offense or anything. You're still my best friend. I just have to get used to this."  
  
"I understand." Riku smiled softly. "Thank you for trying to understand me." He let his arm drop.  
  
"Sure." Sora smiled back, coming to a silent understanding with his friend. They held each other's gaze for a moment before Sora decided to break the calm yet uneasy silence. "Soooo, what does Hideki look like, anyway?"  
  
"Oh, I've got a picture. Hold on." Riku reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet, opening it to reveal a worn photograph. "Here."  
  
Sora took the photo, examining the faces and expressions. A man with short black hair and kind-looking brown eyes stood on the right side of the photograph. He was slightly hunched over because Riku had his arm around his neck, smiling and flashing the 'V' sign. Hideki had one hand in Riku's hair and the other on his lover's arm. On the right was a large white sign proclaiming something in bold red letters. "That's Mutsugoto Hot Springs." Sora muttered out loud. "When was this taken?"  
  
"A little over seven months ago. Remember that weekend when you couldn't find me, and I wouldn't give you a straight answer as to where I was?" Sora nodded, then shook his head, smiling.  
  
"How long have you two been together, anyway?" Sora questioned.  
  
"A little over a year. We went to Mutsugoto to celebrate our six-month anniversary." Riku smiled warmly, remembering the fun they'd had together.  
  
"How did you meet?"  
  
Riku tilted his head back and licked his lips, smirking somewhat inwardly. "It was at school, actually. I was a sophomore and he was a senior. I'm in honors classes, right? And Hideki'd blown off math pretty much all through high school. We had the same Algebra II class. He sat behind me, and I noticed he kept cheating off my papers." He laughed. "Finally, I just asked him if he needed tutoring. He said, 'hell yes,' and we met after school for a while. Then we started meeting at his house. And, well, one thing led to another and we fell in love. Simple as that."  
  
"But, wouldn't that be weird, since you're both guys and all, to just- -fall for each other like that, and have the other know?" As soon as he finished, Sora realized his question made no sense at all, but Riku seemed to understand perfectly.  
  
"No, you see, I was fully aware of the fact that Hideki was gay. It was common knowledge. After a while, I told him that I was too. But we didn't get together right after that. We felt each other out first. Then we realized that we were a good match, and one night- -he just- -kissed me. And I kissed him back. And we've been together ever since. Until now, anyway." Riku's temporary good humor started to fade as he remembered last night's events.  
  
Sora looked at his friend's hurt face for a few moments before looking down at his shoes. As he did so, though, his eyes caught his watch. "Oh, shit! It's almost 12! I'm gonna be late for work!" He stood abruptly. "I'm sorry, Riku. I'll see you later, okay? Good luck." He bent down and gave Riku a light hug, and, for reasons unknown even to him, kissed his friend's cheek.  
  
"Thanks, Sora." Riku returned the hug, brushing the kiss off as if it happened every day. After all, he had kissed Sora's lips the night before, hadn't he?  
  
Sora flashed a grin and ran off in the direction of his workplace. Maybe he could think more about Riku's situation during lulls in business. 


End file.
